The Weaning

It's been a month and a half since my first meeting with the doctor who is helping me become ME again. I have been weaning off Cymbalta since that time and it has been going okay. I am down to 20 mg, every other day, and that will go down even more next week when I visit with Dr. A again. I think the next step, since I've done alright with every other day, is to start to move to every two-three days. Dear Lord.

Do I have side effects? Not like when I was trying to go cold turkey once upon a time. I have had an ongoing stomach ache this week that could be an ICS flare up, since it seems I have eaten nothing but salads that include tomatoes and dried cranberries and tomato saucy things even though I'm not supposed to. Shame on me. But who knew that so many of the things I love were tomato based? I heart tomatoes. And evidently my bladder does not.

It's scary to be rid of my SSRI of choice, something I believed was my sanity for so long. I hope that my body and mind will be leveled out enough for me to take on life unmedicated. I don't know. I do know what it's like when my anxiety levels and OCD obsessive thoughts take control, like a poisonous snake wrapped around my brain. It is truly terrible and oh so hard to explain. I've considered cognitive therapy if the anxiety comes back. And IT has always come back.

I must admit that I have not been exercising. I took a month off Jazzercise. Although I felt awesome after class, I was not losing weight. I plan on going back this month. I know that I will need the endorphin rush, especially if the withdrawal symptoms rear their ugly heads. I hope that I will see results when I begin again, but I may have to keep on keeping on just to keep my mind under control. Hopefully my body will follow.

And the weaning continues...